Partying and deafness are not good friends. That’s because deafness and darkness are incompatible. In particular, I don’t like going to places with very loud music, such as bars, pubs, concerts, etc., using my hearing aids (individual sound amplification devices, for those who don’t know). It’s too much noise, as ironic as that may sound.

The first problem is the (lack of) light

When the nightclub is very well lit, there’s no problem. With light, your eyes will lip-read and everything will work out perfectly. But when it’s E-S-C-U-R-A, my God! For a deaf person, whether or not they use hearing aids, this could fall into the category of a “Chinese torture session”.

Of course, if you’re going out with your friends and staying with them all night, it’ll be very easy to leave.

Flirting, clubbing and deafness

Now, what about when “someone” decides to go on the attack and talk into deaf ears in the dark? It’s something to die for – from anguish, nervousness and laughter the next day.

When the “certain someone” is a suitcase without a handle, the mission is easy: just let them talk to themselves. Okay, it’s mean. But even hearing people do this, so why the hell can’t we, when the going gets tough? We have the right! 🙂

When the “certain someone” is important, then I think we’ve developed a temporary panic syndrome. Nerves on edge. If you ask: “Why?”, I answer: when our deafness is “disguisable” (for lack of a better word) with hearing aids, we see no reason to go around boasting about it. In other words, in general, the “certain someone” won’t even guess that you don’t listen or listen badly. At such times, the invisible handicap puts us in a bad light.

At the very least, you’ll need to use two tricks: call him over to talk where there’s light, or activate your X-ray vision and ask him to talk to you. Off-topic: does anyone know a guy who has the talent to talk to you eye-to-eye, without resorting to whispering in your ear? lol.

I wanted to. But I didn’t understand a word he said

I remember a story (a long time ago!) in which I waited for hours for the guy to come and talk to me. When he finally plucked up the courage, I had already taken a few, but he chose a specific spot in the enclosure with poor lighting. So I put a Colgate smile on my face and agreed with everything the creature said. When we said goodbye, he said, as far as I remember:“Then we’ll do it tomorrow!”. In fact, he talked, talked, talked… But that was the ONLY part of the conversation that I understood. 🙁

The other day, at home, I did everything humanly possible to try to remember the conversation. And nothing! It was so desperate not to know what I had agreed to during the conversation that, when he called me on MSN that day, I did the Egyptian somnosa (translation: I ignored it!).

PS: this post was written in 2010, when I was profoundly deaf and wore hearing aids. Today, I have two cochlear implants and with them I can hear practically everything.

Deafness and darkness, for me, only at bedtime. And it was a ball! 🙂

Would anyone like to share a funny story involving deafness and clubbing in the comments?

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Paula Pfeifer é uma surda que ouve com dois implantes cocleares. Ela é autora dos livros Crônicas da Surdez, Novas Crônicas da Surdez e Saia do Armário da Surdez e lidera a maior comunidade digital do Brasil de pessoas com perda auditiva que são usuárias de próteses auditivas.

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